FALL in love with expression.

A Blur

I’m trying to remember something but I can’t remember anything right now…………
Everything went by so bloody fast…………….wow
The lights were in my face and I danced the night away,
What happened yesterday? No, I mean night, no no I mean day, uggggh whatever………
I think you carried my home last night and I held on to you tight,
I didn’t fight you, you were the one I clung to……..
Where am I?
How did I get here?
Am I telling the truth?
I think I am, I mean I can’t lie to you………
Did all of that really happen to me?
Apparently……..I mean the rush left my body hours ago,
I mean you were there so you know.
Was I myself last night?
Did I have fun?
I don’t remember that much it was all a blur maybe time will cure me and bring back my memory.


“Making It Up”

When you you’re not feeling well, you mean it…………………………………………………..
There are sick days and then there are sick days.
Being mentally/emotionally sick is just as valid as being physically sick.
It is VALID.
One is more acceptable than the other and it bothersome.
Sometimes you just want to run away from all the ignorance surrounding you including your own.
You cry get frustrated and moan,
You feel alone.
Get over it they say but they don’t know your mind and you find it hard to express when you need help and you can’t help yourself.
You fear the words, “It’s all in your mind and you’re making it up.”
It is not in your mind and you are not making it up!
Your thoughts are your thoughts……………
You know why you feel the way you do and no one knows it better than you.
You just people to listen to you,
Not bark at you,
Talk to you and listen to you.
My pain is not made up.
My voice is my voice and I have to use to speak up because if I don’t, I will suffer in silence.
My struggle is not a fairy tale,
It is not moldy bread,
It is not stale.
When I say I’m sad, I mean it.
When I say I don’t feel well I need you take it seriously, I need you to believe it.


Fabulous. Feel the chilly breeze……….
An event.
Let the
Leaves fall off the trees.



That Raw Feeling

You feel raw,
Vulnerable and
You don’t know what to do………………
You feel disgusting you feel like you have the plague, a sickness or the flu
You feel out of control,
You can’t hide behind anything and you can’t play a role,
You feel cold.
Cold like snow,
You wonder why,
Why now?
What is this?
Why now?
What is this?
Its too complex to analyze yet too simple to generalize…….
You feel like water is trying to escape your eyes.
You don’t want to cry.
Reality is you harder than a brick,
You want a treat but you feel like your mind is playing a tricks on you.
You’re embarrassed.
You don’t like this feeling…………..
Maybe this is apart of your healing but you still feel gross……
Why do you feel gross……
You’re so used to hiding it,
Fighting it.
You view it as inferior,
You want to feel superior,
You want to be in control all the time…………….
You feel out of control because you’re finally allowing yourself to feel
To feel something,
To feel human and that scares you.
It shakes you to your core.
You hate feeling raw.


Under a microscope,


Can be candy,
On point.
A snack.

I Ignore You

You look in my eyes and I turn away,
I put the phone in your place,
I ignore the expression on your face,
I disrespect you and I don’t treat you with dignity and grace.
When you try to cuddle next to me, I turn away.
Sometimes I don’t deserve your love or attention yet you still give it to me and I ignore you…………..
Sometimes I feel like bore you.
I don’t deserve you……
What do you see in me?
Your eyes pierce through my soul,
Your stare is so startling,
So bold,
So pure.
Your eyes lure me in….
The lure that cures me,
It eases my anxiety……..
Your touch is so tender, it is a feeling I remember when I feel down.
Your voice, I cherish its unique sound.
You’re so good to me,
So good to me,
So good to
So good
I need to appreciate you more,
Tell you I love you more,
I need to do it more.
You’re a treasure and I’m lucky.
You make me feel,
I can’t explain it,
Your eyes are home.
Tus ojos son mi casa.
Your touch is heaven……..
You’re too good for me,
Too beautiful for my eyes to see,
Too soft for my rusty hands.
When you’re next to me I feel like I can.
You are the sun and I am the storm,
You calm me down and keep me warm.

If I Take Your Hand………………………

If I take your hand, will you make it better?
If you hold me, will I feel calm?
If I trust you, will things be alright?
If you lay with me, will you stay the night?
Will your hug energize me?
Will your words encourage me?
Can I be free around you?
Can I trust you?
I don’t want you to hurt me.
Please don’t hurt me.
Will you try to understand me or reprimand me?
If I take your hand, will you make it better?

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